Kindness is the New Cool: Navigating the LGBTQA+ World from Both Sides

🌀 Perspective One: The Awakening of a New Self

To be LGBTQA+ today is to be in a constant state of transformation. It’s not just about who you love or what you identify as—it’s about discovering a version of yourself that transcends old limitations. For many, this journey feels like unlocking a new level of consciousness, as if you're rewriting your DNA, one truth at a time. You're becoming something new. Something more authentic. Something undeniably you.

But this transformation isn’t soft and poetic—it can be brutal.

🌪️ Social Storms: The side-eyes. The uncomfortable silences. The passive-aggressive questions masked as “concern.” The way people laugh nervously or quickly change the subject when you speak your truth. People treat your identity like it’s a costume, not a soul-deep revelation. That hurts.

🔥 Inner Battles: There’s torment in craving to be seen, heard, and loved as your real self. Not just tolerated—understood. And sometimes, even in rooms full of people, you still feel alone, like you’re speaking a language no one’s willing to learn.

💉 Physical Trials: The surgeries. The hormone swings. The feeling of being a stranger in your own skin as you fight to align your body with your truth. The pain isn't always visible, but it’s relentless. And the world rarely gives you time to heal before demanding explanations.

And in the middle of it all, you’re expected to educate everyone else. Every pronoun. Every change. Every reason why.

But here’s the thing: You don’t owe anyone your story. Still, if you choose to share it—do so with kindness. Not because they deserve it, but because the world will only soften if we lead with grace. Yes, people will mess up your pronouns. They’ll say the wrong things. But most aren’t trying to be cruel—they’re just not there yet. Like you, they’re on a journey.

👀 Perspective Two: Through the Eyes of the “Normie”

You’re at a party. You lock eyes with someone you know you recognize. Same laugh, same eyes—but their voice is different, their body unfamiliar, their name… changed. You panic a little. Say something awkward. Maybe even offensive. You didn’t mean it that way, but… it happened.

The LGBTQA+ world can feel like an alien planet when you’ve never visited. New labels, evolving language, identities you’ve never heard of—let alone understood. You don’t know if saying “he” or “she” is right anymore. You’re scared to ask, because what if you offend them?

And yet, you want to learn. You want to be respectful. But you feel like you’re walking on eggshells.

And here’s the thing: It’s okay not to know everything.

The real problem is when curiosity turns into criticism. When not understanding becomes dismissing. You don’t need to understand someone to respect them. If you’re confused, ask—but ask gently. “Hey, I want to get it right—what pronouns do you use?” goes a long way.

Just because someone’s journey isn’t yours doesn’t mean it’s invalid. You don’t have to relate to show respect.

💡 The Shared Solution: Kindness

Kindness isn’t just a nice idea. It’s survival.

For the LGBTQA+ community: Be patient with the fact that not everyone has caught up. You can protect your boundaries while still being kind. A simple, “I prefer they/them, thank you,” said with grace, can teach someone more than a thousand lectures. You don’t have to be anyone’s teacher, but if you choose to be, your kindness will shape more hearts than any fight ever could.

For the “normies”: Don’t walk around on eggshells—walk with empathy. Ask when unsure. Apologize when wrong. Listen more than you speak. These people are not trying to confuse you or seek attention—they’re trying to live their truth, just like you do.

🌈 In the End...

We’re all stumbling through the same wild, unpredictable maze called life. We’re all learning. And as the world changes, we get the rare chance to evolve with it. But we can only do that together—with open hearts, curious minds, and a little more kindness than we think we need.

Because the truth is: this isn’t a battle between us vs. them.

It’s just a journey—and we’re all walking each other home.